Posted on January 07, 2010. Tags: activists, Animal Activists, blood, fur, motorcycle gangs, motorcycle rally, peta, protesters
Posted by Fuzzy Duffy
Johnstown, PA (GlossyNews)
– Local and state police scoured the hills outside rural Johnstown,
Pennsylvania, after reports of three animal rights activists going
missing after attempting to protest the wearing of leather at a large
motorcycle gang rally this weekend. Two others, previously reported
missing, were discovered by fast food workers “duct taped inside
several fast food restaurant dumpsters,” according to police officials.
“Something just went wrong,” said a still visibly shaken organizer
of the protest. “Something just went horribly, horribly, wrong.”
The organizer said a group of concerned animal rights activist
groups, “growing tired of throwing fake blood and shouting profanities
at older women wearing leather or fur coats,” decided to protest the
annual motorcycle club event “in a hope to show them our outrage at
their wanton use of leather in their clothing and motor bike seats.”
“In fact,” said the organizer, “motorcycle gangs are one of the biggest
abusers of wearing leather, and we decided it was high time that we let
them know that we disagree with them using it…ergo, they should stop.”
According to witnesses, protesters arrived at the event in a vintage
1960’s era Volkswagen van and began to pelt the gang members with
balloons filled with red colored water, simulating blood, and shouting
“you’re murderers” to passers by. This, evidently, is when the brouhaha
began.
“They peed on me!!!” charged one activist. “They grabbed me, said I
looked like I was French, started calling me ‘La Trene’, and duct taped
me to a tree so they could pee on me all day!”
“I…I was trying to show my outrage at a man with a heavy leather
jacket, and he…he didn’t even care. I called him a murderer, and all he
said was, ‘You can’t prove that.’ Next thing I know he forced me to
ride on the back of his motorcycle all day, and would not let me off,
because his girl friend was out of town and I was almost a woman.”
Still others claimed they were forced to eat hamburgers and hot dogs
under duress. Those who resisted were allegedly held down while several
bikers “farted on their heads.”
Police officials declined comments on any leads or arrests due to
the ongoing nature of the investigation, however, organizers for the
motorcycle club rally expressed “surprise” at the allegations.
“That’s preposterous,” said one high-ranking member of the biker
organizing committee. “We were having a party, and these people showed
up and were very rude to us. They threw things at us, called us names,
and tried to ruin the entire event. So, what did we do? We invited them
to the party! What could be more friendly than that? You know, just
because we are all members of motorcycle clubs does not mean we do not
care about inclusiveness. Personally, I think it shows a lack of
character for them to be saying such nasty things about us after we
bent over backwards to make them feel welcome.”
When confronted with the allegations of force-feeding the activists
meat, using them as ad hoc latrines, leaving them incapacitated in fast
food restaurant dumpsters, and ‘farting on their heads,’ the organizer
declined to comment in detail. “That’s just our secret handshake,”
assured the organizer.
